so for a bit of context, (skip to ~~ to the start of the sexual stuff.)
i have always been a bit of a loner my whole life, im not unatractive by sociatal standards, but i dont do well when it comes to socializing and have been diagnozed with anxiety and depression.
ive started talking to this girl. (lets call her jess, names have been swaped around for obvios reasons)
and things have been going well, we dont particularly talk alot, nor do we have the lovy dovy teen relationships i see other having with all the public affection, but we get along well and enjoy one anothers company.
so fast forward a month, and jess invites me over to her house for a sleepover, and the whole time even tho i have a semi sexual mind, it really never occured to me that anything sexual would happen, as im to much of a pussy to really ingage, ask to do anything.
we have a good night, talking alot, we made dinner for her family, watch a couple rom coms and just cuddle and spoon with a little groping here and there :)
about midnight comes along and the groping get abit more serios, i start to kiss her along the neck, whilst at the same time cupping her boobs over her shirt, and lightly flick and tease her areola. then she turns around kissing me and starts to kiss me down all the way to my stomach, i was semi flacid at this point as ive had a boner for the last 2 or 3 hours so its died down a little, but she proceeds to ask me for concent. and my anxiety starts to kick in. i start to freeze and stop replying, overthinking about how she might not enjoy it, or how i might not be big enough (im just shy of 6 inches), or that ill just do something wrong in general and fuck things up.
all the while she just reasures me that i should feel no pressure to do anything i dont want and that she wants to if i want to and that i wont do anything wrong and can stop at any time. after a couple minutes of this, i finaly feel comfurtable enough to proceed and she tells me to take off my pants, i slowly push my pants and boxers down and it springs up, still semi hard. knowing that this was my first time, jess says to put my hand on her head, and to use my hand to decide the tempo, and with this, she grabs my shaft and starts
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the sensation of a diffrent person's hand, touching and holding one of your most delicate and sensitive areas. the warmth and size of the hand itself, he heat of the breath coming from your partner, and the feeling of trust and of letting things go to another person, it is an intense feeling from the start. the light strokes mixed with the uncertainty of not knowing what she was going to do really started to turn me on as i started to get erect.
now fully erect she put her mouth on my dick with the guidence of my hands, and the wetness felt from head is a feeling i still cant get over till this day. her tounge started to glide over my head as her hands stroked my shaft, and all the while she looked me dead in the eyes and i couldnt stop myself from releasing sounds that ive never done whist masturbating. knowing i was enjoying this she started to go faster and slightly deeper, and i keeped my hands on her head, just trying to hang on to my ride, this is where i started to feel more confident in myself as i grabed her hair and started to increase the speed, at the same time becoming more vocal with my words, telling her how good it feels.
after a couple minutes i feel myself start to tense up, knowing im about to cum i let her know that im about to cum, and if she had a tissue ready or anything? but she just keeped on going and i knew to follow along, my own greed taking over i trusted myself deep and fast until i had the most intense and blisful orgasm. after i came to my sense again i realised that she swallowed, and that i had been unconscious for about the last 20 or so seconds, and she was talking to me but i wasnt responding.
"that was amazing" i said. turning her over, and kissing her "now its my turn" :)
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